Thursday, April 30, 2009

the TOUGH but not TABU talk about sex with the kids

As my kids get older (our oldest girl turns 12 next week), I am not too comfortable with talking about sex with them.  I ran across this blog post from Scott Williams, campus pastor, and had to share it with you.  HERE is the link.  Below I've copied the article:

7 Methods To Talk To My Son About Sex…
Last year I had written a blog post in which I talked about it not being time to talk to my then 8 year old son about sex, in a post titled Let's Talk About Sex.  Well it's been over a year and my son will turn 10 years old on May 12th and between now and then I will officially sit down and talk to my son about the birds and the bees.

It's becoming more evident that it's time to have "The Talk" as he's beginning to share conversations that his friends are having, in addition to asking questions like: "What does  it mean to have a girlfriend?"  I plan on our conversation to happen during a fellas night out with just he and I; maybe even over an ice cream sundae or some Starbucks.  Here are the 7 Methods To Talk To My Son About Sex…:

  1. Ask him questions about his knowledge and understanding of what sex is.
  2. Set clear boundaries of what the Bible says about sex and the fact that it's saved for married couples. (Teach Abstinence)
  3. Outline a vague anatomy of sex discussion.
  4. Talk about the myths he will hear and face on television, through music, in sports at school…
  5. Talk about age/continuum expectations relative to friendships, dating, relationships and girlfriends.
  6. Talk about his responsibility as a young Christian leader as it relates to relationships and sex.
  7. Set clear expectations for him to be able to talk to me about, or ask me questions about anything and everything under the sun.  Reminding him that I will always tell him exactly what he needs to know.  (No stupid questions, all questions are encouraged)

These are my thoughts for now and I'm looking forward and not looking forward to having this conversation at the same time.  My first born is about to be 10 years old and will be in the 5th grade next year.  This will be a big moment for my son and I have the opportunity/responsibility to make it be a moment that he will never forget.

What age did/will you talk about Sex with your children?  Did your parents sit you down and talk about sex or did you learn about the "Birds and the Bees" during recess?  Thoughts, discuss!  Go HERE to leave a comment on Scott's original post.

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